I am conscious that I haven’t posted on here in a while and I’ve had a cold all week and I think it’s finally reached my brain because I decided to try shitposting. I normally reserve this for Facebook or my various WhatsApp group chats but 2019 is all about trying new things so here are my 16 tips for beating a cold.
how to beat a cold:
1. drink your entire bodyweight in water
2. snort a whole eucalyptus
3. carry tissues with you even if you’re just moving from the table to the sofa. you won’t want to get up again.
5. sit around pinching the bridge of your nose going ‘arrghh’ (this is a surefire tip, 100% effective)
7. eat all the comfort food and then feel worse
8. whinge about it to your friends a LOT
9. visualise soup
10. call ur mum
11. blanket up. everything’s blankets now.
12. never remove your dressing gown unless you want to DIE
13. steamy steam but not for too long or your lungs get sad
14. try to recall a time when you weren’t ill. it’s impossible. but try.
16. whinge some more. everybody enjoys it when you do that.
I hope the rest of this year brings you many healthy, not-sneezy days. Happy January ❤